Testing, Testing, Never Resting

I have to admit, I thought the title for this post was so clever. It came to me as I sang these "revised" words to the tune of the song I knew so well... Then it came to me- as I mentioned before cartoon songs are always running through my head, and this particular one is from the show Backyardigans. Once I realized not everyone would know the song in their heads when they read the title, I was a little heart broken, but decided to use it none less, since it was so fitting. That is what my life with Hannah Grace has been like lately- she has been "testing, testing, never resting".

I told Ryan's mom the other day, I'm pretty much to the point where I feel like I know nothing. What happened to my theory that I would have perfect behaved children and IF, yes IF, they ever acted out, I would handle it perfectly and nip the problem in the bud, and never see it rear it's ugly head again. Besides, if my amazing parenting skills weren't enough to pull me through, I had years of every college level child development, child psychology, family life, and sociology class you could ever hope for- I mean I KNOW how these little minds work. HAHAHAHA. Who did I think I was kidding?!? Here is my revised theory- I am sinful, my children are sinful, all we have is the grace of God and our love for Him and for each other.

Let me elaborate- and I am not one of those bloggers that have tons of readers and tons of commenters, but please know if you want to comment, feel free, I am open to any and all advice at this point, haha. There have been three major issues I have been dealing with with Hannah.

1. Tantrums

2. Potty Training Hurdles

3. Napping Defiance

1. Tantrums-

Okay, Where do they learn how to do this?! As I have heard and said it said before, if you don't believe in natural sin before you have kids, you will after!!! They do not have to be taught the word "mine" and they certainly don't have to be shown how to kick and scream (at least I can't recall a time that I laid on the floor for a demonstration of screaming and kicking and flailing my arms for Hannah, or screaming and backing my body as hard as possible into the corner or wall for Bennett) They figure these out all on their own! Lately Hannah Grace has been throwing tantrums over anything. A few mornings ago it was over wanting a pack of fruit snacks at (;00 in the morning that I wouldn't let her have. I thought I would try a new approach of ignoring her completely. After thirty minutes of non stop blood curdling screams, I realized this was not going to work, so we did the time out chair. This has probably been one of the more successful routes to take. I simply put her in the chair and tell her she can't get down until she is ready to calm down and stop crying. I would say about 75% of the time, this works fairly well. This particular day however, when she had fooled me into thinking she was calm and I went to go get her we began again at square one. Spanking I think I have come to realize works better for a particular action that deserves punishment- i.e. you push your brother, you get a spanking, you touch something after being told no, you get a spanking. Spanking is a little harder when it comes to fits- NOT to say I haven't done it- in fact, it was my main course of action at first. I kind of realized it may not be such a good idea, when the other day after taking a good fall, Bennett was crying and Hannah told him firmly "Bennett, top cwying, or I pank your bottom." Hmmmm...

Anyways, sometimes I just feel so helpless and out of control- the only thing that keeps me feeling in control is not giving in to what she wants. It is so tempting sometimes to just say "Fine- have your fifth cup of milk instead of water" and avoid the whole scream fest, but I know the once I lose my ground and start giving in it is all over from there. So for now, I pray that "this too shall pass", stay strong, and I guess continue on with the time out option- again open to any suggestions in this department!

2. Potty Training- Oh My!

Again, I had such a distorted view of how this would go. I know not every body does struggle with this, but Hannah has been difficult to potty train. I bought her potty seat when she turned two (we already had one that I had sat her on the big toilet a once in a while before that- which she didn't care for). At that point, I thought we would ease in and no question she would be potty trained by two and a half at the latest. Here we are a month past the 2 1/2 mark with little to no progress. In the countless times we have sat on the potty, we had one hit, and too many messes. I don't mind cleaning up the messes, it is when I say "Hannah do you need to sit on the potty" and she emphatically- almost upsetedly says "NOO!" and literally minute later she has tinkled all over the floor, that I have a hard time staying calm cool and collected- which I know is what I am supposed to do. We have tried to make sitting on the potty a good experience for her. In fact I have recently set up a little basket next to her potty with some panties, stickers that she only gets on the potty, etc. Sometimes she likes to wear her big girl underwear- but sometimes she asks to put a diaper on. I think this has some to do with the fact that she is around her little brother and Blake who she doesn't see as "babies" but as her buddies, and they are in diapers, so why shouldn't she be? She has also pooped in her underwear before and not even come to tell me. I guess some signs point to that she's not ready and some signs point to she is- besides- shouldn't she be ready!?! We will NOT turn three and not be potty trained- I refuse and will take desperate measures before it comes to that. Another idea I have brewing is to potty train her and Bennett together- at not even a year and a half, that boy is telling me when he poops in his diaper. I may also just have to not have the boys here for a couple days and be able to just focus on doing this with her- it is hard with two other curious ones either distracting her or getting in to trouble if I try to keep them away. We may be able to go cold turkey with diapers if I was able to have that opportunity. I will keep you posted, right now I am just trying to have patience.

3. Never Resting

Oh nap time. I always loved that Hannah was so good about going down for naps and going to bed. In the last couple of weeks, that has very quickly changed. It is a BATTLE to get her to go down and seriously half the days she won't take a nap period. I guess I would be okay with it if she was in a good mood despite it, but if you recall problem #1- I don't think this helps the situation. I am high and dry on ideas for this too- We try to coax her with all the things she loves about bed time/ nap time- her blankies, stories, prayers- but that doesn't work and my problem has become how do I get her to cooperate with out making going down a punishment- i.e- spanking her for throwing a fit about not wanting to take a nap, then putting her in her bed. I am afraid doing that will just give the idea that going to bed is a punishment. I don't KNOW! This is the recurring theme of this post isn't it!!!!

Bottom line, I obviously love this girl no matter what and it's not that she is never happy, fun, or easy to manage- she is just definitely going through a trying period where she is testing us. I love her and I just pray the good Lord will equip me with everything I need to raise her to love Him-(and if she could be a well behaved little girl, it would be a nice bonus)Haha. She does have going for her that she has the biggest heart you can have at the age of only 2 1/2.

A little sweet...

and a little sassy...

And a couple playing outside...